Skip to main content

Not Alone

Resonating- that feeling you get when someone says something that is exactly what you were thinking and didn't know for sure how to say it.

One of the hardest parts about moving to Boston was the feeling that I was in this alone. Yes, I had Nate, but that was it.* I struggled to connect to people at church and didn't feel like I fit in with my coworkers. I've realized now that a lot of it had to do with me and my unwillingness to connect. But it's hard to be 28 and move some place new and start over with new people.

Insecurity is something I have dealt with more and more as I get older. I think I always struggled with it, but it took moving away from all my friends and family for me to truly see how big of an issue it was for me. It's really easy for me to get bogged down and worried about how I come across and whether or not others like me... but that robs me. It robs my joy, self esteem, friendships, and my marriage. And I think God let me go through this to learn to lean harder and stronger on him. Do i still have days where I want to stay in bed and mope? Yes. But it's not every day, and you know what? It's. Ok.

And then I read this blog post by a good friend's wife. I hardly know her, but we are so much alike. Her writing is honest and real. My take away is that it's ok to feel how you feel. Read this and feel encouraged: Laura LaBeau- Soulfully Fed

*Let me be very clear- Nate was incredible during that time. He knew that something was wrong, but never pushed me to share more than I was comfortable. He prayerfully supported me through one of the toughest parts of my life so far. I can never be grateful enough for this man.


Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Caught

I am a Christian who voted for Hillary. Now that that's out of the way... I've noticed a growing disconnect between the way I was raised and the expectations for me. When I mentioned in passing to my mom that I had never voted for the person who became president, there was a pause. And when the question finally came, "You voted for Hillary?" there was something there I couldn't place. Surprise, sure... but something else. I've felt it this whole election cycle. Christians passionately and loudly came down on both sides. Listen, neither candidate was perfect, and neither exemplifies Biblical living perfectly. Now that that's out of the way... Here are my thoughts... here's why  I voted for her. 1. I was raised to be a thoughtful, caring and compassionate person. I was taught that my value does not come from the words people use to describe me (although that does show me the value they place on me). So when I hear a man who is runni
Post a Comment
Read more

Resting Secure

As most of you know, I'm deep in the teaching job search. Which is growing my faith like crazy, and I love that part (really, only that part). And for a reason I can only explain as God, I have a huge peace through this process. The last time I did this (two years ago in Indianapolis), I was putting all my hopes in me and how awesome I thought I was. And, no surprise, I didn't get a job, but did get a big piece of humble pie. Which is why this peace I have now is too good to keep to myself. About a month ago, I found out there was unofficially a job opening at the school I work at now, in exactly the grade level I want to teach (5th), and I really liked the teachers who also taught that grade. But I wasn't exactly sure I even wanted to stay in this district, or even at that school. There were a lot of things I just wasn't used to, and I was worried I wouldn't be happy. So, I prayed about it- for clarity and specific direction. About two weeks later, I had a very
Post a Comment
Read more

Worth the Chance

Originally I had planned on only posting when I had something to add to my 1000 Gifts list. But that would mean two things: 1. I could potentially go for a long time without posting anything 2. I would actually have to look for things to be grateful for... And there it is. The hard part. I can say so many times that I am a grateful person, and that I have so much to be grateful for. So making a list of 1000 things should be no problem (especially for an avid list maker such as myself). And yet... this is only my second blog post, and it's been about two weeks. In my Bible reading this week I was reading in Judges and came across a very hard verse. To put into context what's going on here, the Israelites have entered the promised land. And, with Joshua's help, they have driven out the occupants, started to settle the land, and are beginning to enjoy peace from God. Except... they haven't done so great with driving out the occupants. For any number of r
Post a Comment
Read more