I hate having to justify myself or defend every word I say to people. I constantly temper my speech afraid of upsetting people. The last two days, I've had encounters with coworkers were I slipped- I bashed things in-line with cultural norms, said things that derailed whole conversations without thinking about what I meant to say before I said it.
And man does the negativity seep in. I hate being misunderstood and I hate when people misunderstanding me leads to me wondering what they think of me. The worst part of it is that today's encounter specifically points to my faith. And instead of pointing to Christ, I tried to walk back what I said so I wasn't one of "those Christians."
So now I'm left with 2 battles. Letting go of the fact that other people's opinions of me don't define my identity, and not replaying the situation in my head perpetuating my negative heart-mindset. Do I wallow... or do I give this self-doubt to the One who knows my heart and gets me without me having to say a word? One way leads to growth, one way fuels the anxiety.
Breathe in. Surrender to Him.
Oh. And if you're like me and need a pick me up on days like this?
My advice:
1. Talk to your person. You know who they are.
2. Check out essential oils. I love Cheer blend by doterra.
3. Listen to this playlist I made (free if you're on Amazon Prime)
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